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Topics of current thread - Go back to top - Post a brand new message	Author	Date
Si c'est pas trop tard	Sacré Moi	2003-05-20
Re: Si c'est pas trop tard	Schwicky	2003-05-26
Re: Si c'est pas trop tard	Ben	2005-06-06
Re: Re: Si c'est pas trop tard	Schwicky	2005-06-06

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Name:	Schwicky
Date:	2003-05-13 21:38:29
Subject:	Tous dans la rue !
	En avant l'anarchie ! C'est comme s'il n'y avait pas assez de jours fériés au moi de mai en temps normal... C'est quoi qui met les fonctionnaires en grève ce coup-ci ? Il y a quelqu'un pour m'expliquer le Schmielblick ? Si j'ai bien compris, c'est une histoire de retraite. Ça faisait longtemps aussi qu'on ne nous l'avait pas faite, celle-là. Décidément soit je suis sur la mauvaise planète ou j'ai toujours rien compris à la mentalité française. Je compte sur vous pour m'éclairer le bon chemin.

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"Good afternoon, madam. How may I help you?"

"Good afternoon. I'd like a FrintArms HandCannon, please."

"A--? Oh, now, that's an awfully big gun for such a lovely lady. I
mean, not everybody thinks ladies should carry guns at all, though I
say they have a right to. But I think... I might... Let's have a look
down here. I might have just the thing for you. Yes, here we are!
Look at that, isn't it neat? Now that is a FrintArms product as well,
but it's what's called a laser -- a light-pistol some people call
them. Very small, as you see; fits easily into a pocket or bag; won't
spoil the line of a jacket; and you won't feel you're lugging half a
tonne of iron around with you. We do a range of matching accessories,
including -- if I may say so -- a rather saucy garter holster. Wish I
got to do the fitting for that! Ha -- just my little joke. And
there's *even*... here we are -- this special presentation pack: gun,
charged battery, charging unit, beautiful glider-hide shoulder holster
with adjustable fitting and contrast stitching, and a discount on your
next battery. Full instructions, of course, and a voucher for free
lessons at your local gun club or range. Or there's the *special*
presentation pack; it has all the other one's got but with *two*
charged batteries and a night-sight, too. Here, feel that -- don't
worry, it's a dummy battery -- isn't it neat? Feel how light it is?
Smooth, see? No bits to stick out and catch on your clothes, *and*
beautifully balanced. And of course the beauty of a laser is, there's
no recoil. Because it's shooting light, you see? Beautiful gun,
beautiful gun; my wife has one. Really. That's not a line, she
really has. Now, I can do you that one -- with a battery and a free
charge -- for ninety-five; or the presentation pack on a special
offer for one-nineteen; or this, the special presentation pack, for
one-forty-nine."

"I'll take the special."

"Sound choice, madam, *sound* choice. Now, do--?"

"And a HandCannon, with the eighty-mill silencer, five GP clips, three six-five AP/wire-flechettes clips, two bipropellant HE clips, and a
Special Projectile Pack if you have one -- the one with the embedding
rounds, not the signalers. I assume the night-sight on this toy is
compatible?"

"Aah... yes, And how does madam wish to pay?"

She slapped her credit card on the counter. "Eventually."

-- Iain M. Banks, "Against a Dark Background"
Anonymous